Lately, I do not know where my head has been. This feeling is becoming ever stronger inside my head and in my very soul.. I do not get it at all. I feel so much confidence, expecting too much of people, urging to exercise til exhaustion, Negative, Egotistic, Abating life, Original Sin, provoking people, Being selfish, and so much more. Lately I have called this Second chance a Disaster of a relapse. I have no idea what has brung this on. Everything is going so perfect. Everything. I love my life yet something is filling my brain with these destructive Egotistical Thoughts. Which I guess is okay with some of them, because a lot of people do get down on themselves and doubt their ability.
Why? Seriously doubt yourself. You have one life to live. Live it to the fullest. I think the ominous weather is being destructive on my thoughts. Rain has always had a huge part in the destruction of my mind. Fall is ever uplifting and Winter is a sparkling wonderland. That ever sound is amazingly amplified. I love it.
Lately, facebook or rather people on facebook are pissing me off. Mostly people who claim to be stay at home moms. It just fucking pisses me off that people think being a stay at home mom is boring, were lazy, nothing to do, or I guess Poor because only your husband is working. I don't know what kind of mother they are but the only time I get free time is morning, naptime, and oh yeah when my husband is home.
My day starts at 5:30 a.m. Yes kiddos I am awake with the sun. I go for a 30min to an Hour of running/Walking my Alaskan malamutes. I make my husbands lunch. Kiss him goodbye. I then do some start of cleaning. We in my house refuse to have messes, including kid toys everywhere. They have two bedrooms to keep there toys in. Then at about oh...10:30 the kids wake up. I make then some eyes, pancakes, french toast, or anything else they want. Cleaning dishes, sweeping up fur, taking care of my bird, exercise. Play with the kiddos til lunch. Make lots more food. THen play until 2:00 naptime. They sleep maybe two hours which is me finishing everything, starting dinner, phone calls, and more exercise. Then they wake up and then daddy may be home. Then its time for the kids to eat and then if its nice the kids play at the park and I go on a 1-2 mile walk with my best friend. Home finally at sometime and my bedtime is like 2 am. Hmm...yup I am so lazy.
Not only that but we have enough money for me to be a stay at home mom so In that case I dont have to fight with my husband. I get what I want.
No amount of money would make me quit my favorite job. Stay at hime mom
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